How To Be Romantic When You Have Kids

How To Be Romantic When You Have KidsBy Ron Zvagelsky

There is just no denying it – children change a relationship. No matter how much passion, fire, and intimacy you have once children are born your relationship will change. The main change will come about as you begin to put the needs of your children and the family unit as a whole as a priority, followed by the needs of the couple. Many times, husbands and wives begin to feel neglected as the day-to-day struggles of life take their toll.


Not only do the day’s tasks take their toll on the relationship, but also many couples begin to feel very tired. Both parties may be working and then have to deal with the family responsibilities when they come home, or maybe mom stays home all day and eagerly waits for dad to arrive so he can help with the kids. This may be unfair to dad who has worked hard all day and wants to come home to take a break. Either way, one thing is certain- the romantic life suffers.

However, there is hope. Just because you have children, doesn’t mean that you have to throw away all romantic notions by the wayside. In fact, marriages are strengthened and become more stable when couples commit to spending time together and engaging in romantic activities.

The first area to consider is spending time together alone. When children come into the picture (especially babies) finding time alone can be challenging. New moms especially are tired and may even look forward to when dad comes home so they can get some rest. It is a good idea to set aside some time where the two of you can just be alone. If that means taking a nap during the day when the baby is sleeping, then do so. Once the baby or older children go to bed, take advantage of the time that you and your partner have alone. It may be a while before you find a babysitter and feel comfortable leaving your little one at home, but that doesn’t mean that you and your partner can no longer be romantic.

Here are some activities that you can do with your partner once your children are asleep:

Have a picnic by the fireplace

This is great for cold winter nights. Light a fire, lay down a blanket (or a bear skin rug) and have a picnic by the fireplace. Some wonderful items to include are: wine, cheese, fruit, or chocolate covered strawberries. Everyone agrees that there is nothing more romantic then firelight.

Sit outside on the patio and watch the stars.

A wonderfully romantic getaway (while not straying far from home) is to simply stargaze with your lover. By the end of the evening, you will be staring at the stars in each other’s eyes.

Take a bubble bath together

Nothing beats a large garden tub made for two, if you have a hot tub or Jacuzzi all the better. After the children go to bed, enjoy a relaxing evening in the hot tub or Jacuzzi. If you don’t have one or the other, a bubble bath in a large tub is just as enjoyable.

Play a romantic game together

Playing a romantic game together is a great activity that will help put you in the mood. There are many games available for purchase online or at your local novelty supply store.

Read a book to your partner

Just lying in bed together, snuggling and cuddling while reading a book to your partner can be very romantic. It beats watching the television or a movie and allows for plenty of discourse. Besides, when you read a book together, you will always have that time as a cherished memory.

About the Author: Ron Zvagelsky has a degree in Business Administration from the University of Southern California. Use PlanJam.com to find additional Romantic


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